Men’s silence harmful in fighting
deadly prostate cancer………
PHOTO BY EVGENY SERGEEV
Richard Robbins/The Commercial Appeal/from
Thinkstock photos
Commercial Appeal, The (Memphis, TN)
December 1, 2013
It’s time to talk Brown Burnett Special to The Commercial Appeal
Edition: Memphis Section: Features Page: 1
During October, Breast Cancer Awareness Month, the color pink was ever-present. Pink ribbons were everywhere, football teams wore pink helmets and pink shoes, even this newspaper was pink for a day to help spread awareness of the disease.
September, Prostate Cancer Month, arrived and departed with a much quieter voice, its light-blue color theme failing to capture the attention of both the public and the mass media.
Yet the National Cancer Institute projects that more than 238,590 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2013, with almost 29,720 deaths; compared to projections that 232,340 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer and that 39,620 women (and 410 men) will die from that disease in the same time frame.
One of the reasons that prostate cancer awareness keeps a lower profile is that the disease is, quite literally, a silent killer.
“Men simply don’t talk about prostate cancer, particularly among themselves,” says urologist, surgeon and researcher Dr. Mitch Steiner, CEO and co-founder of GTx, a Memphis-based biopharmaceutical and cancer research company. “I believe it’s a cultural thing. Women do talk about their cancer.
“That’s why the fight against breast cancer has become such a powerful presence every October.”
Dr. Christopher Ledbetter, a Memphis urologist with UT Methodist Healthcare group, says he’s noticed that when men are around each other, they simply don’t talk about anything having to do with their health, whether high blood pressure or prostate cancer. Jokes and “locker room” talk dominate discussion instead of a serious dialogue. Such a discussion among men would not only spread awareness but also help them deal with their physical and psychological recovery from surgical and/or radiological treatment.
“Men see talking about it as a weakness, and I hope that changes,” Ledbetter said. “Men often make light of it among themselves, calling it an old man’s disease, which it’s not. It’s still cancer, and even though it generally strikes after the age of 60, that’s still the prime of life for many men.”
Prostate cancer treatment, whether it’s radiological treatment or surgery, has side effects that can threaten and damage men’s self-esteem and their traditional concepts of masculinity, causing men to retreat further into their shells. The trauma of erectile dysfunction and incontinence can occur during the recovery period and, in some cases, become permanent. Prostate cancer is a family problem, Ledbetter says, and open conversation with a significant other remains a key to successful recovery and leading a happy, productive life.
“If a man has a supportive spouse and they can talk freely and openly about the situation, that helps tremendously,” Ledbetter said, “particularly if they do it before the surgery.”
On the third Thursday of each month, Man2Man, a group of prostate cancer survivors, meets at The West Clinic in East Memphis to discuss their treatment experiences and how they dealt with and continue to deal with life after prostate cancer. Wives are invited to attend, as is anyone who has been touched by the disease.
Some men in the meeting are fully recovered from their cancer while some still suffer from the aftereffects months, even years later. The men are there to support one another, to share their experiences and to spread some knowledge and hope. The meeting has been held at various locations throughout the city for more than a decade, and sometimes attendance reaches more than a dozen.
On this night, eight men attended, and they spoke freely but with a request of anonymity to preserve their privacy.
“All men who have been through this, and are still going through this, need to do what we’re doing here,” said a 68-year-old survivor named Clarence. “When I was diagnosed with prostate cancer back in the mid-’90s, I didn’t talk to anyone about it, particularly other men, and the number one problem I had was ED (erectile dysfunction).”
Clarence discussed his recovery openly with his wife, and he said she was with him “all the way.”
“She even found my surgeon for me.”
He also found a benefit from his cancer that caught him completely by surprise.
“It changed the way I viewed sex — totally,” he said. “My perceptions of sex were not accurate. I’ve actually become a better man because of prostate cancer.”
Charles, a 68-year-old mental health professional, said the physical part of his relationship with his wife was on the wane anyway when he had his cancer, but the “intimacy and the passion” remain in their relationship. He said a change in libido and sexual performance, even ED and incontinence, loom on the horizon for all men as they age.
“A man’s definition of masculinity has to be broadened as he ages, prostate cancer or no prostate cancer,” he said. “Personal empowerment and coping strategy are issues, and getting together in groups like this are examples of how to develop those things.”
Ed, 65, said he and his wife got through his surgery five years ago thanks to their 35-year-old friendship and humor.
“Turns out she was going through menopause at the same time, so we helped each other,” he said. Education and discussion concerning prostate cancer before treatment can help a patient brace for post-treatment circumstances. Ledbetter says that pre-surgery patients often don’t know which questions to ask, fostering unrealistic expectations of brief recovery times and minimal post-surgical side effects.
In the past few years, the da Vinci robotic laparoscopic surgical system has meant less blood loss, smaller incisions and a more rapid recovery time, but major surgery is still major surgery, Ledbetter said.
“We don’t downplay the consequences of surgery,” Ledbetter said. “Any surgery requires an adjustment. If you explain it well beforehand, it can relieve the anxiety from the side effects that are ahead.
“Patients also need to know that things usually get better, and if after six months or so there is not significant improvement, there are options using drugs such as Viagra as well as surgery and the use of prostheses.”
Steiner stresses that each prostate cancer and each prostate cancer patient’s recovery time is different, depending on factors such as age and physical condition.
“Society tends to lump it as one big disease, but it’s not,” he said. “It affects everyone differently. That’s why men need to talk about their cancer, with their spouses and other men. That’s how we’ll increase awareness: by sharing information.”
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Resources
To find out more about the Man2Man prostate cancer support group, call 901-401-0086 or email man2mangroup@att.net or website www.man2mansupport.org
Other resources include:
UsTOO International Prostate Cancer Education and Support Network was founded in 1990 by five men who had prostate cancer. UsTOO offers information, materials and peer support to men and their families. They also sponsor more than 300 prostate cancer support groups worldwide; Man2Man Group is the Memphis Chapter of UsTOO. Their thorough website about prostate cancer can be found at www.ustoo.org, and they can also be reached at 1-800-808-7866.
National Cancer Institute offers prostate cancer support materials and information through their website, www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/types/prostate, and at 1-800-422-6237.
The American Cancer Society can be reached at 1-800-227-2345 for help with prostate cancer support and materials, and also through their website, www.cancer.org/cancer/prostatecancer/index.
Illustration by Richard Robbins/The Commercial Appeal/from Thinkstock photos
Keywords: men disease health care statistic
Copyright (c) 2013 The Commercial Appeal, Memphis, TN
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